Thursday, November 20, 2008

BAss Ackwards

Todd leaves for deer hunting today, and yesterday all I did all day was make cookies, rice krispies treats, and prepare goodies for him to take up to deer camp. Oh, and I did all the laundry too. All 6 loads. He needs clean clothes to wear, ya know. And I'm not done yet with the treats. I still have to make a huge vat of my homemade applesauce today.

Before Todd and I had children I didn't mind deer hunting at all. I couldn't understand what all these women were complaining about. I got to go out with just my girlfriends, watch whatever I wanted on television without eye rolling or sighing, eat as much junk food as I could in a week, go shopping, stay up as late as I wanted without worrying about waking him up when I finally did make it to bed. It was actually always a nice relaxing week. Not that I didn't enjoy having him around the rest of the year. I did. But I have always been a girl who likes her alone time, and that week was always nice for me.

But now that we have kids it gets a bit more complicated. I don't have anymore "me time". No more massages or shopping trips (unless I want to drag the three screaming banshees along with me). Plus, the whole week before he leaves I am baking and cooking for his trip. How backwards is that? "Hey honey, I'm gonna be gone for an entire week drinking, playing cards, and yakking with my buds while you stay home with the kids. And, oh by the way, could you make a couple hundred dozen cookies, a few meals, and side dishes for us to eat while we are up there? Thanks."

And not only do I not get a break for even a moment for an entire week, but the boys are grouchy and mad the whole time daddy is gone because they wanted to go with him. Sounds like fun right?

Still, I'm glad Todd gets to go every year. Even though it is a huge pain in the rump for me, he deserves it. He works really hard for our family. His job is a nightmare at times. I certainly would NOT want to do what he does on a daily basis. He works long days and still comes home and wants to help, participate, and play. So he needs a break. He deserves a break. And I am happy to be able to help him enjoy it.

I just hope that he will be just as happy to give me a break soon. Maybe for BlogHer?

40 comments:

wheelsonthebus said...

does he at least usually return with food for the fsmily?

Laura said...

you need a break too...Blogher would be great - I am hoping to go...I also try to get away twice a year for a scrapbooking weekend with my girl friends - it helps.

Good luck this week.

Mel said...

I'm going to stop whining about Garry having to travel for work...and being gone 2-3 nights in a row. A week? You are my idol. Sending hugs and blessings...and extra patience your way.

Dawn said...

The Blog Her conference is the same thing I told my husband that I wanted to go to the last time he took off for a race! He doesn't hunt, but he travels to races and I'm wanting a get away of my own. Best of luck to you this week as you go it alone with the kiddos. ;)

kimmy said...

I feel your pain. My husband works long hours and we rarely see him during the work week. And, when he goes away for football weekends I help prepare the food for him and his friends.

Kimmy

Janah said...

I was impressed the second I read you got all of the laundry done. Everything after that, would have been a bonus for me!
Kudos to you!

A Buns Life said...

If you go to blogher that would be such an incentive for me to go!

It's hard for me to not get testy when they go on these boy trips...when really it is my fault that I don't take the same girl trips. I just feel too guilty, do you think they feel the same guilt?

Kat said...

A Buns Life- EXACTLY!!!!! That mommy guilt is a killer!
It is not too difficult (most times) for me to be supportive of Todd's hunting trips because he is so appreciative. And he is ALWAYS telling me how I should take a girl's weekend. And he even told me I should go to the Chicago (just over 2 hours from our house!) BlogHer. But honestly, it is my fault that I don't follow through. Well, that and the fact that it is SUPER hard to find a weekend when all of us mommies can get together. That is very difficult. It seems like someone is always pregnant, or nursing, or working, or the spouse is working, or the kids are sick. It is always something. Still, I know hubby is supportive of it. I just have to DO IT!

CC said...

With all the "guy" activities I "let" my husband do, I figure he owes me. Big time.

maggie's mind said...

You are such a good wife, and I'm sure Todd appreciates it. I also think you totally deserve to go to BlogHer. Plus get a massage some other time while he hangs out with the kids.

Kelley said...

Good luck with the week, and I hope you guys have some fun, too. Though I do know from experience the craziness when husbands are gone. When Jon was gone for a week this summer, Ben broke his foot. Then when he was gone for a weekend, Matt's razor scooter was stolen. Oh well. Hopefully yours will go better than mine did.

Maybe you could start a new tradition with your kids for the deer hunting week.

Tonya said...

My hubby wants to go to Canada fishing for a week except that it takes a day of driving to get there and another one to get back so it is more like 9 days away. I'm thinking about BlogHer it is just so close not to go!!!

lime said...

turn about is fair play. i say if you want to go to blogher he ought to return the favor and give you that opportunity.

lime said...

oops just read the comments....glad to hear is supportive of that proposal. follow through this year. you'll be glad you did.

imbeingheldhostage said...

Do more than just survive this week! Put those cherub faces to bed, stretch out diagonally on your bed and snack while watching some great chick flicks.

when is blogher? I'm thinking after my hubby gets home from his stint of playing cards, yakking with buds while I am chaining his children to the closest telephone pole, I want to go too.

Momisodes said...

You are so sweet Kat.

Time without hubby/daddy is so exhausting, mentally and physically.

I'd love to have a BlogHer break! I would love to meet you there :)

MamaGeek @ Works For Us said...

Hey just think, in a few more years he'll be taking all the boys along and then you'll get the entire time to yourself, right? :)

The Griper said...

he grins as he says,

get a couple of cages, tape their mouths shut, and throw the kids in the cages for the week. tell them its a learning lesson of life when they do bad things when they grow up. :)

Fire Hunt said...

I have 6 loads to do also you and the kids can come to Ohio and help my hehe.

Lisa said...

You deserve a break before blogher!
Get a sitter one night while he's gone & go relive what it was like to have the girl nights out. Everyone will be happy you did!

Robyn said...

I know exactly how your feel since J left about an hour ago and isn't coming home until next Fri. I took a bunch of vacation time so I wouldn't be so frazzled with work and being by myself. I don't bake or do any of those nice things that you do though. J doesn't get the me time either I have to pull teeth to get a day or two. What is this BlogHer?

Kat said...

Lisa- Part of the problem is that none of my girlfriends live around here. Todd is my going out buddy, and he is gone! ;)
I do have my haircut appointment next week. That is a little me time. Maybe I'll stretch it out into a massage too. I still have a one hour massage that Todd bought me a while back. Hmmm. :)

Kat said...

The Griper- Okay. But if social services comes knocking on my door I'm sending them YOUR way. ;)

Jaysi said...

Oh, I so feel your pain on this one. Well, not the getting him ready part...that is bass ackward for sure! My husband does travel for work though, and ugh...it is so hard. I mean I guess we need all the food in our mouths roof over our heads jazz, but do you have to leave me here with the kids to make that happen????

Hang in there. And don't forget....you can get a sitter while he is gone. It does wonders for your outlook to get a night out!

ewe are here said...

You are much nicer than me...

Megan said...

I really hope you get to take a break and go somewhere for a couple days! That is very nice of you to cook for him and stuff! I've been missing your posts because for some stupid reason I hadn't added you to my blog roll--but you're on there now!

The Griper said...

social services? isn't that a government agency? if it is, there is no worry. it takes them ages to investigate any claims. besides by the time Todd gets back you can let them out of their cages and declare that they are on probation. :) another life lesson on the workings of government.

Chris said...

You absolutely deserve some time alone. And I'm glad to read that your husband thinks so. Take him up on it -- it's good for you.
I'm not looking for brownie points here, but I can honestly say that I can't think of a harder job on Earth than being a stay at home mom.
And if you have a good husband - and it sounds like you do -- he'll agree with me.

Elaine A. said...

That's the thing, it's wonderful that he gets to do that and you support him, but you need a break too. I hope you get one soon. Blogher would be awesome and it's pretty close to you next time. (fingers crossed that I can go...)

Rice Krispie treasts...mmmmmmmmm

Rick said...

Me are such animals. What am I saying? I am one!!

Next year be sure the boys have taken hunter safety courses, purchase cammios, take them to a shoot range, and buy them a gun for Christmas.

He'll get the hint.

Mom24 said...

The other day we were talking about what it's like to have a baby and Jacob said, "I'm glad I'm not a girl". I tried to stress there's wonderful things about being a woman, but it was a hard sell. I think if he heard this post he'd be doubly glad. We do make it easy on them, don't we? Even if you do go to Blogher, I would bet there's a good chance you'd be the one to end up making food for them to eat while you're gone, making sure there's always someone there with the boys (like if he has to work, etc.) Again, we do make it easy on them to be them man, although they do work awfully hard for us.

Hope you have a good week. Put them to bed early!

Dianna said...

I'm right there with ya sister*!*
Hubby got back on Sunday from a week long hunting trip in South Dakota...and left Wed. morning for a 5 day business trip...and I felt guilty about going for 2 1/2 days to Chicago!!! That's alright, my birthday and Christmas are coming ;)
I used to get so aggrivated that he didn't seem to have as hard of a time leaving the kids as I did...we're just wired different I guess.

You HAVE to get away girl.
MAKE the time.
You will ALL benefit.
You just have to let it go, take a deep breath and DO it.

Not Your Aunt Bea said...

Totally think you should do the massage with the hair cut next week. Then go out to eat, have some wine, and have dessert too! Thanks for the support too.

HM said...

You are such a good wife!

tweetey30 said...

Wow. Like i said before Jeff works 60+ hours a week for pomp's Tire and still comes home and plays with the girls and takes care of them while I work 3rd shift.. yes you are a great wife.. Take care and hope you can have a few hours of alone time while he's gone.

DysFUNctional Mom said...

There's something on my blog for you. ♥

Nap Warden said...

I totally get this:P It's a ton of work when Husband is away...and I only have two!
I go skiing every year with the Bro, and leave Husband with kiddos. That's my break. You should totally try to make Blogher...it's in my backyard ya know;)

Tiaras and Tantrums said...

soon - when the boys are older - won't you have your week of peace back??

Kelli @ Gohn Crazy said...

I hope your week goes well. It is hard but at the same time it is nice to give hubbies a well deserved break too. I sometimes wish I'd have a week alone due to The Husband doing something fun than always off on business trips.

Kristen said...

I get the whole hunting thing. Chet hunts too. But thankfully we moved to within miles of where he Elk hunts so there is no need to be gone for a week. But I get it. It's hard. It sucks, and you are being an awesome wife!!

But, I also think that you deserve a break too!! And since blogher is in Chicago and totally driveable for you, I am so saying that you need to go!!! And hey, if you end up needing a roomie, let me know! Chicago is one of my most favorite cities!

Words To Live By

Be grateful for each new day.
A new day that you have never lived before.
Twenty-four new, fresh, unexplored hours to use usefully and profitably.
We can squander, neglect, or use them.
Life will be richer or poorer by the way we use today.
Finish every day and be done with it.
You have done what you could;
some blunders and absurdities crept in;
forget them as soon as you can.
Tomorrow is a new day.
You shall begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be
encumbered with your old nonsense.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson