Sometimes as an adult you forget who you really are. Sometimes children, and life, and responsibilities take over so much that you forget what you were really all about to begin with.
Tonight the hubby and I went to see a comedian that was passing through our city. We have been big fans of Brian Reagan for a number of years now so when we saw that he was making a stop in our little town we immediately booked our tickets and secured our spot for tonight's show.
It was just what we needed.
Right before we were to leave the hubby and I started arguing. Something about how I hate always having to be the heavy and he hates always having to take care of work (even when he is at home), and we were both pissed. I didnt' feel like going out. He didn't feel like spending any time with me. But, somehow, we prepped our kids and we left the house for our night out.
First we went to a little restaurant we had never been to before. We ate English food (fish and chips) and had a few drinks. The hubby kept on his phone for work, I nearly chucked it out the window, and then finally we were enjoying ourselves. Just the two of us. It turned out to be a great dinner.
After a few drinks and a wonderful dinner, we were at the theater, ready for some good ole comic relief.
Thank God we made it. I was laughing so hard I seriously had to get up and pee three separate times so I didn't have an accident. The opening act was so funny and Brian Reagan was a freaking blast. I felt human again. I remembered what my old life used to be like. I remembered what I used to be like. I felt like me again.
Slowly but surely, I felt myself coming back again. Not that I don't love being a mom and a wife, and a homemaker, but something about all of that makes us forget who we were before. I guess I forgot that I used to be wild. And FUN. And I have a great sense of humor. I don't get to use it a whole lot when I'm barking out orders to "do homework" and "pick up toys" and "eat your dinner", but I'm still there. That fun-loving girl that really likes to have a good time. I'm still there.
A couple of times tonight, in between fits of laughter, I turned to Todd and said, "I feel human again. I feel like me." I forgot how important that was.
Yep. Tonight was just what we needed.
Yes, I may always miss having a baby, or being pregnant, but there is definitely something special about getting back to me again. And I may just be ready.