In The Blink Of An Eye

Sometimes life moves too quickly to enjoy it.  Days are filled up with must do's, need to's, and I don't want to's.  We get so bogged down with lists and chores that before you know it a week has gone by in a blur.

Now that we are back in to the swing of the school year I am making an effort to slow down.

Take time to smell the flowers.  Bring my life back into focus. Take a deep breath.

I want to enjoy this luscious fall. The smells, the sounds, the sights.  And yes, the activities. Enjoy my family. Enjoy myself.

Life goes by too quickly as it is.  I don't have time for rushing. I want to savor.




(The above pictures are of a white-lined Sphinx Hummingbird Moth that I have been trying to capture for weeks.  The beautiful little thing moves so quickly {it's wings as fast as a hummingbird's} it is difficult to catch.  Luckily, I have many of them in my backyard and they don't seem to mind my camera- or my hand being held underneath them, they have such fuzzy bodies!  Beautiful creatures.  Love them.)

My Shadow

It doesn't take long before it begins.  

I am on my early morning run.  It is hovering just over 80 degrees, heavy on the humidity.  My legs feel strong.  My shoulders are loose.  I take deep, even breaths. As I take off down my street I almost feel like I do in my reoccurring dream, lightening fast, strong, ready to fly.  

I settle into my music and the clutter filling up my day falls away.  I watch two squirrels running across the road, fighting as they go.  A cardinal dashes by me and I dodge a wasp heading right for my leg. I watch the construction crew working on the house down the street, and the man watering his lawn, and the dog who watches me.

I check my pace at the mile marker and I'm impressed.  Faster than I normally go.  And in this heat. Nice.

Then it begins.  "You're running much faster. You are going to tire sooner. You are probably getting tired already. You are not built for speed. You're going to have to walk soon. See how hard you are puffing now?" My brain is working overtime to get my body to stop.  

I spot my negative trend and try to turn it around. I even out my breathing again and make sure to keep the same pace I had on the first mile. I tune back into my music and run on. 

"Brave" comes on my iPod and I feel my pace quicken even more. I think about how I want my children be brave. Attack life head on with wild abandon. Live without fears holding them back. Put everything they've got into what they want. I want that for them. And for me.

"The wind is really picking up now. That always wears you out. This is a big hill coming up, maybe after that you'll have to walk.  You haven't had enough water for this heat and you don't want to get a migraine." My brain warns.

I physically shake my head to snap these negatives loose. Why is it that I can be everyone else's cheerleader but my own?

I feel myself begin to tire.  I feel sluggish.  Knowing my brain is winning this battle I run through my checklist.  

My legs still feel strong. My shoulders are loose. My breathing is even. My back feels good. I'm okay. I can do this. 

"You're not tired. You're doing great! You are getting stronger. You can do this!" I chant to myself.

Before my brain can interrupt I catch my shadow out of the corner of my eye. 

"Is that me?" my brain asks. "Is that what I look like?" 

My shadow doesn't look tired. My shadow looks strong. My shadow looks powerful. My shadow looks brave. My shadow looks fast and free. My shadow looks like me.  

I put my head down and barrel through. I can do it. Faster and longer than I have before.

I get out of my head, turn off my brain, and just go.

I can be brave too.

Alone

The Way It Goes

You all know how I feel about it by now.  There really isn't much more I can say on the subject that I haven't already said here and here.  

I don't like letting go. Especially letting go of my babies.  But let go I must.  It is the way life goes. 

 

(First day of 3rd, 4K, 1st, and 5th)

It doesn't mean I have to like it.  They will always be my babies.  Not having them with me is tough.

But I'm excited for them.  New adventures, new experiences, learning and growing, making friends. I'm so proud of these little people I am sending out into the world. So proud. And so grateful.

Yes, this is the way it goes.  I just wish it wouldn't go so quickly.  

Winding Down

It is the night before the first day of school.  The outfits are picked out. Lunches are planned. Backpacks are laid out by the door.  Lectures were given on the importance of kindness and compassion towards all classmates, being a friend to all, always trying your best, and being responsible and dependable. Showers are taken, teeth are brushed.  Prayers have been said. The children are now snug and in their beds.  

The kids are excited for school to start.  Part of me wonders if I failed them.  Didn't I make summer fun enough for them to lament the return of school?  Last year they wanted summer to last forever. 

Just as I begin to get that old guilty feeling I look back over our summer and see we had plenty of fun this past summer.  Sure, it may not have been the warmest summer, and very little swimming was to be had, but we still managed to have some wonderful times.  We took our first family trip to Chicago.  We went up north often.  We took a trip to Bay Beach.  The two older boys went to Boy Scout camp. The boys played baseball, Gracie started ballet. And, yes, we got in a little bit of swimming too. Even this last weekend before school we managed to get in some more fun.  

On Saturday we went to the county fair.  Of course, one of the kids' favorite summer activities. Tommy was finally tall enough to ride The Zipper and he and I braved the crazy ride together.  After experiencing just how wild that ride was Tommy and Joe (who is an expert at The Zipper now) encouraged Ben (who is already tall enough) to wait another year or two.

The kids ran from ride to ride, getting more and more daring with each one.  Gracie may just be the bravest of the group as she constantly asked for the ride to go faster and higher and spin more.  No more baby rides for Grace.  She likes the big rides. It is good to know that there will never be a shortage of riding partners for me when it comes to the big crazy rides and roller coasters.

Sunday was the first wedding our whole family was invited to.  It is difficult to get an invite for a family of six and we never expect it, so it was a pleasant surprise when my cousin went out of her way to make sure I knew the kids were welcome at this wedding.

The kids were so excited (mostly for the dancing and cake). Grace loves watching all the wedding shows with me on TLC so she insisted on going to the church ceremony while Todd and the boys sat that one out.  The wedding was about an hour away with a three plus hour wait in between the wedding and the reception, so I didn't think it was a good idea to bring four kids to a ceremony and make them sit around for close to 4 hours.  Instead, Grace, my mom, and I went to the ceremony and then came back home to pick up the menfolk for the reception.  

It was a beautiful, fun wedding.  As predicted the kids had a blast dancing.  We could barely pull Grace and Ben away from the dance floor at the end of the night.  Those two were dancing together for just about every dance.  Ben would spin Grace around and dip her.  Man, he is gonna be such a ladies' man someday, and she is definitely aptly named.  And bonus! There was a photo booth at the wedding that the kids became obsessed over.  It was definitely a good time for them.

Today was a bit more laid back.  Grocery shopping (remind me to NEVER go grocery shopping the day before school starts, EVER AGAIN), making cookies, riding bikes, playing outside, and stacking wood for the coming fall.

Now the kids are sleeping (hopefully) and I am busy prepping cameras and video cameras, filling out last minute paperwork for school, and writing special notes for lunch boxes on the first day of school.

I'm glad the kids are excited for school. I'm happy for them. But I'm sad to see our summer go so quickly. I would have liked a little more time.  A little more time with my littles.

The are little for such a short time.

August Crazy

August has been a crazy month.  We've got so much going on.

Last night we took our kids to their school orientation to meet their teachers and bring all of their school supplies to their respective classrooms.  Desks were organized, lockers were set up (my oldest has now graduated to the upstairs of the school, complete with lockers!), and friends and teachers were greeted.  It was an exciting and hectic night.  The kids are now ready to go back to school.  I, on the other hand, am not ready for them to go.

Only one weekend left of summer and it will be jam packed with fun.  We still have our county fair to go to. An annual event that is talked about and anticipated year round.  And we have yet another wedding to go to on Sunday.  This will be the first wedding all of our children will be attending with us.  I am so excited for them.  Weddings are just so much fun and I remember having such a blast when I was a kid, dancing with the cousins, eating cake.  It will be a fun one.

The entire month of August seems to have been dedicated to weddings.  Each weekend there has either been a bridal shower or a wedding.  This past weekend Grace and I attended my cousin's (first cousin, once removed- thanks for the lesson, Hilary!) bridal shower.  It was a gorgeous shower in a garden on a beautiful day.

Grace lucked out again and this time all the little girls received pink parasols.

A picture of my cousin (middle) and her girls and grandgirls.  The beautiful bride is in the white dress.

And I even got a nice pic of my mom, Grace, and myself.

Oh yeah.  And I'm blond now.  Not sure about the blond, but I get bored, as you know.  Give it a little while and I will probably be a redhead next.  Or maybe black hair.  Dark brown?  Who knows.

Hopefully I will be able to fit in some good, solid relaxation into these next few days, because once school hits so does the serious busy-craziness.  Football, swimming, boy scouts, meetings, schedules, homework.  It is a good thing that my kids (and I) love their school so much, otherwise I'd probably force them to stay home with me for some homeschooling. Ha!

How are y'all handling the back to school craziness?

Weekend Wonderful

Summer is quickly approaching it's end.  In an effort to make the most of it the last few days have been jam packed with activities.  

On Grace's birthday the weather cooperated just enough to visit one of the kids' favorite places, Bookworm Gardens.  And this time Todd was able to join us.  It was a special treat.  

Joey wasn't in a "take my picture" kind of a mood but I snuck a few shots of him anyway. This picture he actually allowed me to take.  Joe was pretending he was pulling the wagon and Ben was the horse, in case you couldn't tell.

On Friday we drove up to Green Bay for the day.  Todd had to check out the new Cabelas (and of course the kids loved looking around too) and then we stopped off at Lambeau Field to check out a sportsmen show.  The kids are always thrilled at any opportunity to stop at the stadium so that was a bonus.

After that we checked BAY BEACH off of our "to do" list.  We have always meant to take the kids there but have never gone.  And, it was also a first for Todd and myself as well.  That is really unheard of in these parts as Bay Beach is legendary.  For those of you not in the know Bay Beach is an amusement park that has been around since long before my day.  In all that time it has maintained the same price of 25 cents to 50 cents for the rides.  We were so unaccustomed to such amazing prices that we really overbought on tickets.  We figured a family of six might need about $40 in tickets and that more than covered it.  They had swings, bumper cars, a scrambler, pony rides, a huge slide, a train, kiddie rides, a carosel, a tilt a whirl, you name it! They even a really nice size roller coaster! We rode every ride at least once and we went on the roller coaster five times in a row.  It was the boys' first time (Grace was just a bit too short for the roller coaster this year) on a roller coaster and they are still talking about it.  It was an awesome day!

After our fabulous time at Bay Beach we took the kids to dinner at our new favorite restaurant Kaleidoscope. The kids were literally crying with hunger and exhaustion by the time we got to the restaurant. Thankfully, a few kiddie cocktails, some amazing appetizers, and a delicious meal was enough to perk them up.  

Overall, I think it was one of the best days we've had all summer.

On Saturday Todd and I attended his cousin's wedding.  It took place on a big farm with a beautiful barn. The setting was absolutely gorgeous and so appropriate. You see, Todd's grandma and grandpa owned a huge farm. Todd's mother grew up on the farm with her 13 brothers and sisters and the cousins now operate some of the largest dairy farms in Calumet County. So a farm wedding. Charming. And very appropriate.

 The view inside the barn.

Shabby chic decor.  Mason jars, flags, and flowers. Each guest even got a mason jar mug for drinks and to take home.  Love that.

 Hubby and I in the barn.

(please notice my shoes)

This is Todd's grandma and grandpa's couch.  The bride insisted it be dragged out of her mother's basement and brought to the wedding so she could get pictures taken on it.  I think it was a genius idea. This couch is far older than I and I am told by the aunts and uncles that there were many "good times" on this couch down in grandma's basement.  I didn't ask for details.

There were animals wandering around (a farm, people) and this peacock decided to get in on this picture with us. How perfect is that?

I turned out to be a kind of unofficial photographer that night and I can't tell you how many aunts, uncles, and cousins wanted pictures on this couch.  I was happy to oblige but I made them take a couple of Todd and I as well.

 The beautiful bride and groom.

 A barn dance! AKA- the reception.

It was a gorgeous wedding and I had an absolute blast.  Todd's family is just so much fun and the bride and groom are so perfect together.  It was lovely.

Remember when I pointed out my shoes in the above picture?  I LOVE those shoes.  However, I found out that they are not the best shoes to wear for 12 hours in a row when there is lots of walking and dancing.  Toward the end of the night I was joking with people that my feet were bloody little stumps (and I am told that the bride even put a note in the invite not to wear high heels- again, the wedding is on a FARM- but I missed that note and I probably would have worn them anyway).  Indeed, the next day my feet really were bloody little stumps.  I had approximately 6 bandages on my toes just to make it to church.  *sigh*  The things we do for fashion.  FYI- I'd do it again too.  

There really was no time to rest my aching feet (which are still sore, swollen, and bloody today, by the way) as we had to head out to our nephew's (and Todd's godson) high school graduation party.  It was the perfect day for it. Beautiful sunny weather, lots of games, great food, and awesome people. 

It was a weekend full of wonderful, I tell you. I loved every minute of it.

I think I'm getting payback for it today, however.  The kids have been crazy out of control.  But, oh well. Weekends like these don't come around often and they serve as good reminders of how quickly time really does fly by.

The weather is finally supposed to be hot enough to go swimming this week so hopefully we can make it to the lake to make some more wonderful memories before our summer ends. Never can have enough wonderful summer memories.